Do You Like The Things That Life Is Showing You……

13 Dec

So….it’s been awhile and I guess my first order of business is to tie up the loose ends that I kinda left hanging when I took a little hiatus. First, I am getting a divorce. Yes, ladies and gentlemen…it was time. I had been called names one too many times, and my heart was turning into an icebox *in my Omarion voice* where my heart used to be. Plus, I could do bad by myself (put a pin in that one, we are gonna come back to that). I gave up on my first junior cougar mission, after it became apparent that all he was good for was….fucking. That was it, and I am in a part of my life where I need just a little bit more. Not much more, like a husband, but someone I can have a decent conversation with. Furthermore, little homie thought the rest haven for wayward men had just opened up. Soon the text messages began to be exactly like this:

Him: Good Morning
Me: Good Morning Handsome
Him: I wanna fuck you so bad
Me: I want you too…..I miss me some “T” in the morning
Him: Can I hold some money?
Me: *making the WTF” face

I mean, really? Really? It didn’t take too long for me to figure out he wanted a sugarmama, and that I am not. Shit, I have two kids. If you aren’t them, then, I can’t help you.

In other news, since letting my husband go, my finances took a big ole hit. It’s nothing I can’t handle because I have been doing this single parent thing for a minute. But if any of you followed my blog back in 2005, you will remember I bought my first “new-new” car. Yeah, “New-New” got repo’d. *insert gasp* I’ll wait for you to compose yourselves. And to make it worse it was at work when they did it…and my ass w:s screaming like a maniac. I always watch Repo Wars and always said I would act dignified, but my ass was literally about to jump in the car to keep him from taking it. To make a long story short, I had to ride with a long winded co-worker for a few days, rented a Dodge Charger (rolling like a big shot…lol) and then eventually chunkin‘ Enterprise the deuces and now I am all settled in my 1990(yeah you read that right) Honda Accord–for now. I guess it’s good tax time is coming so I can upgrade, but then again I am loving this little-to-no car payment thing I have going and I have never had insurance in the double digits!!!

I guess the next question would be, have I found someone? The answer to that is: Kinda. I don’t really know what to call us…but we have consummated a whole lot of times (but not lately….put a pin in that one) we hang out…but lately its been kinda….meh. The consummation? Has dwindled down to nothing…..he said it is because he has not been in the mood and he wants to get to know me and not my vag-jay-jay(yeah I just did that)….but I have a feeling that may not be the case. First, this man’s profession requires him to spend about 45% of his time in the club (and I am not making that percentage up…my nerdy ass just calculated it), second because of his popularity I have seen females throw themselves at him left and right (when I say seen, I mean with my own two eyes) and I don’t know any man to turn down that much pussy. But he says sleeping with a woman he meets in the club is like sleeping with people at your workplace and he wouldn’t do that. I guess. Only time will tell.

On the mental health front, I need to get control of my PMS or something. This week I spent one night crying, drinking moscato, and listening to sad music (while the new friend was here…ugh) . It was really bad. And when I got to work the next day? Bam. There was Aunt Flo. Why Aunt Flo must you turn me into a Crazy Bitch? I am serious…shit, I am scared of who ever the fuck that was that showed up that day. I don’t even KNOW why I was UPSET!!!! I just was. I need to get that fixed STAT, because if I don’t I am gonna end up alone, talking to my two cats in my hoarded house.

Well, that’s all I have tonight, but I look forward to blogging being a better outlet, than Facebook or hell even Twitter. Maybe this will keep the Crazy Bitch from popping up next month. Till next time…xoxoxo!


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