Fortunate

28 Feb

I promise I am not going to start singing Maxwell or anything like that. If this was the MySpace days, my mood would read: Fortunate. We all know that I am Queen Complaining Pants and I ride by faithfully on my Wahhhambulance, but I have really been blessed beyond measure. In the last 10 months my life has changed in so many drastic ways, I can’t believe sometimes how far God brought me. Last Friday, I saw Raekwon at the Howard Theater and it was EPIC! No, there was not a crowd like it was 1995, but I had a ball! I had absolutely NO voice when I left, from screaming the words to every song in his catalog. On my ride home, I teared up a little bit. Though it was just a 32 dollar ticket for a show (my drinks were free, because…well I’m me…lol)I thought about times when I couldn’t afford happy hour, or to take my kids to a dollar a ride carnival. God is good ya’ll. That’s all I can say. There is not a day that goes by that I do not praise Him for where he brought me from. I thank Him for giving me strength when everyone else told me to give up. I thank Him for closing doors that I tried to force or prop open. I thank Him for all the people that told me I would never be anything, that I would never see life outside of Virginia Beach, that told me because I had two kids I would never make it in life. If it wasn’t for those people I would not have fought as hard as I did. I thank God for my Aunt and God brother, who showed me the meaning of friendship and love. I thank Him for my friends Tee Bird, Birdie, and Red Velvet…..those ladies kept me lifted in times when I SURELY thought I was going to go off the cliff. I thank Him for all of the new friendships and the old ones that have been rekindled since I have relocated to the DMV. I thank Him for my Goons, Beasley and Chunk. God saved me through those two. So today, my attitude is gratitude! I am finally on the right regimen of meds for my Bipolar Disorder II. See what happens when you are honest with your doctor? The trilipetal has been great for mood stabilization. I don’t feel like a zombie, I am not gaining insane amounts of weight, I just feel….even. The greatest test was last week, when I had to look at my calender to see when my cycle was set to start because there hadn’t been a Mariah Carey moment that week. I am happy to be finally on the right track. Spring is quickly approaching so you know what that means! My racing season is on it’s way! So far, I am signed up for 5 different races this spring and I am excited to complete my first half marathon in September. I met with my running group a few weeks ago and we talked about our running goals, and mine is to stop being afraid of the “long run”. The long run is usually a Sunday run that is between 6-13 miles. Yeah, get into that. The idea of running six miles makes me nervous. I feel like I did the first time I ever rode Apollos Chariot every time I think about it. Do you know how many long runs I have punked out of? Three. I don’t want this Sunday to be the fourth. I keep trying to hype myself up. Hell, a nine pound baby passed through this body and I drove myself home from the hospital 2 days later. So I know my body is capable, I just need to get my mind ready. Wish me luck this Sunday as I get up before the chickens and try to bang out 6 miles.

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