15 Signs You Are Actually Blanche Devereaux

18 Jul

Thought Catalog

1. You have been handcuffed for 32 hours — and NOT in a prison cell mind you.

It is your personal best.

2. You KNOW You Look Good.

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How dare anyone tell you any differently?

3. You have ever made yourself so hot and bothered that u had to cool yourself off with couple spritzes of water!

You’re just that hot and confident.

4. No matter how depressed you get, you know that cheesecake will be there to save u.

So yummy.

5. Surprises have a tendency to make you jumpier than a virgin at a prison rodeo!

That’s pretty jumpy, isn’t it?

6. You have absolutely perfected the art of lying about your age!

So many things to do in life before you turn “40”!

7. You really like to take a deep breath before you greet a man because it thrusts your breasts forward!

Don’t forget all…

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