My Craigslist Roommate From Hell Thought I Ate Her Tub Of Margarine

22 Aug

I tried the roommate thing, and ended up with the same kind of bat-shit crazy. The lesson: no more roommates. Ever.

Thought Catalog

This one time, I thought I had a boyfriend. One day, we were in his kitchen making breakfast and he commented about how it was very obvious I’d been living on my own for a long time. Something about how I wasn’t very aware of him being around me. Basically, I was blocking his way a lot. Some might blame that on a butt-fuck narrow kitchen that I would argue even the most polite and aware of people would still have trouble navigating, but dudes who you think are your boyfriend will blame it on you being in the way. Reading this over now, that I thought I had a boyfriend when I actually didn’t is also evidence that I’ve lived on my own for a long time.

Narrow kitchens aside, it is true. That I’ve lived on my own for a long time, not that I get in the…

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