5 Reasons To Never Take Ambien

9 Sep

Ch…..I once posted a horribly written poem on this very blog while….on ambien. It’s the devil ya’ll…

Thought Catalog

1. You will write poetry.

It will be terrible poetry. You will think it is monumental, groundbreaking, heart-wrenching poetry. But I repeat: It will be terrible poetry. You will realize this the next morning, but you will continue to write this awful Ambien Poetry each time you pop the pill. You will likely even share the Ambien Poetry with friends, acquaintances, strangers, animals, and inanimate objects. They will all pretend to enjoy it, but they will never take you seriously again. Even your dog thinks you are a failure and a druggie.

2. You will probably injure yourself.

In a futile attempt to make it from the couch (where you have been sitting staring blankly at Rob Delaney’s standup special on Netflix for over an hour) to your bed, you will sway and stumble ever so drunkenly, eventually landing you flush with the tile floor, where you will proceed to…

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