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8 Signs You Are A Disney Villain, And Not A Princess

1 Oct

I have always rooted for the villains in Disney movies because deep down, I never felt they were bad people, they were hurt people. These are people who have been ostracized in some way and yes, they are mad a the world and this is how they deal. But, be clear: one thing I won’t do is stab you in the back… will be in the front, as I make no apologies for who I am.

Thought Catalog

1. You’re not insanely good-looking.

I mean, you’re all right. You might have some high cheekbones, or a symmetrical nose, or big eyes — but you’re not Princess hot. You don’t have the kind of looks that allow you to float through life on a cloud of cutting in line, harmonizing with forest creatures, and impressing in-laws just by looking over your shoulder at them. While this can occasionally be a crushing blow to your ego — such as when you’re in a dressing room and suddenly realize that this club dress/ball gown doesn’t look good on you — you’ve mostly adapted to the realities of your appearance and decided that you’re going to have to make it on your personality/cunning/entrepreneurial spirit.

2. People don’t magically fall in love with you wherever you go.

For some reason, when you walk through your provincial town to attend to your daily…

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Your Privilege Isn’t The Problem, You Are The Problem

24 Sep

Thought Catalog

To an extent, Kate Menendez got something right. In her recent article, Menendez bemoans the fact that she did not choose to be wealthy, and she’s correct: You can’t choose your class status. If you could, I would have chosen to be born on a pile of money instead of growing up in a trailer park to a mother who worked in factories and fast food restaurants to put dinner on the table. I used to date a doctor whose parents lived in the Gold Coast, and when I walked into his house for the first time, I felt like Brittany Murphy in Clueless, overwhelmed by the way he grew up. I muttered to myself, “You guys got Coke here?”

Because that’s the thing: People often learn about privilege in seeing what they lack. It’s why the wealthy have a hard time dealing with class issues in the…

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Dear parents, you need to control your kids. Sincerely, non-parents

20 Sep


The Matt Walsh Blog

To the fan I lost yesterday:

I don’t owe you an explanation, but I thought I’d offer one anyway. I do this more for your sake than mine. You see, maybe, as you later suggested, I was in a bad mood. Maybe I could have been a bit more polite about it. Maybe I’m more sensitive to it now that I have kids. Maybe I’m just sick of hearing these comments about parents. Maybe I know that my wife has to take the twins with her when she goes grocery shopping sometimes, so she could easily be on the receiving end of your sort of bullying. Maybe I took it personally.

Whatever the case, there I was, walking down the aisles of the grocery store looking for the ingredients for a new chili recipe I wanted to try. I heard the kid screaming from a distance; the whole store heard…

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My Thoughts Told in GIF’s: iOS7, Birthdays and Meetings

18 Sep

When I woke up this morning and realized today was the release day for iOS7:

When my daughter, who’s turning 10 told me she wanted a birthday party in New Orleans:

How my team walks into meetings:

When I see someone with no edges trying to clown someone

When someone is humblebragging:

My Twistout had me walking out of my house like:

How to Keep A Library Of (Physical) Books

17 Sep

Thought Catalog

The hardest part of my most recent move: figuring how to transport nearly 1,500 books. All the rest of our stuff–in the age of IKEA–turned out to be easier to sell on Craigslist or throw away than to move. But the books? Something had to be done.

They are my life and my livelihood.

Ultimately, I ended up hiring 1-800-Pack-Rat to send a portable storage unit to my house– a pod 8 feet by 8 feet by 8 feet– which I filled up and then shipped off to the new house. Nearly 30 full boxes of books were loaded in (plenty of space left if I’d had more). I used movers on TaskRabbit and didn’t have to pick up a single one. The books arrived right outside my door about ten days later. It was amazing. I wish I’d thought of it before.

See, I’ve been keeping a library for…

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10 Emotions That Only Breaking Bad Addicts Know

17 Sep

Thought Catalog

Warning: Contains spoilers about the most recent episode.

1. Purple Fatigue

The strangely exhausting feeling that accompanies Marie’s more calm scenes, when we are reminded of the shoplifting, compulsive lying, Pier 1-purple world that she lives in when she’s not freaking out about being framed for meth production. In between her rightful rage, we remember that she’s kind of a really frustrating and cloying character who we used to hate so much (remember how cathartic it was when Skyler finally screamed at her to shut up?). Of course Marie has her right to be mad — even if she likes sticking the knife in and watching it twist, à la sitting there while Skyler tells Walt Jr everything — but you still kind of hate her for her gaudy taste in color schemes and the fact that she never got taken down for being an undeniably terrible/hypocritical person. Ugh.


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Random Thoughts

17 Sep


When I am Talking…..

I had a meeting this morning to over the statistics for my department and to talk about some of the policies that I have implemented and how they are working.  Prior to this position, I would get trampled in meetings.  I usually sat there with my notepad and when it was my turn to talk I would usually find myself cut off or some other bullshit.  When I came to my new job, there was a new rule.  Put away the “nice” in meetings.  Our meetings are where we talk about ways to make each area more efficient and most recently integrating the EMR software into the office setting.  Today, while I was reviewing my policy regarding messaging with the software and in the middle of my review the black Regina George tried it.

Her: I don’t really think…

Me: I. AM. TALKING.  We can sing together, but we can’t talk together.  As, I was saying….

What you won’t do, anymore is talk over me.  For a long time I would just let people cut me off, shut me down and whatever the hell else they wanted.  Nope, nope, nope.  If you try it, trust and believe I will pull that shade down and NEVER let it back up.  Miss Thing apologized afterwards, and I bet you that will be her last time interrupting Miss Page.



Day three post half marathon and I am surprisingly feeling very good!  I will probably do a recovery run tomorrow and then start training for Hard Rock next week.  This time I will be SURE to get in a long run, now that I know what my half marathon pace is.  My goal is to learn how maintain that pace and not fly like a bat out of hell when the gun goes off.  This next half is special because I will be running it with my sister, which is something I never thought would happen.

Tragedy at the Navy Yard

Yesterday was a really hard day around here as there was a shooting at the Navy Yard, and 12 people were killed.  There were a few people n my office who had family members working down there and I watched as my co-workers struggled to get in contact with their family members to make sure they were OK.  Fortunately, they were all able to get in contact with their loved ones, but I kept thinking about those that didn’t get good news yesterday.  Someone sent their loved one off to work yesterday, not knowing that person would not come home.  This morning I made sure I hugged my kids extra tight and let them know I loved them before leaving them at the daycare for the day.  It is a shame that you aren’t even safe at work anymore.


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